June 6, 2013

The Midnight Horror Collection: Bloody Slashers

Moving on to yet another Echo Bridge Home Entertainment four movie pack, I find that I'm now in a world of "Bloody Slashers", i.e. the least interesting and most formulaic horror subgenre.

Originally released in October 2010, I actually bought my copy from the pawn shop almost a year ago to this day. It's scary how time flies, and it's even scarier that I've only just got round to watching all these movies.

Room 33 (2009)

"Hidden in the woods is an abandoned institution where many suffered horrible deaths. It is also where a group of road trippers are forced to settle for the night, and where someone is waiting for them—Roxy, a deranged, abused girl with a deadly secret. As the institution takes on a life of its own and mutilated bodies are discovered, the group races to learn Roxy's story and uncover a savage killer in their midst."

The girls are nice looking, the Roller Derby team makes an unusual set of victims, but everything becomes very generic once the cell phone tropes and discovery contrivances start appearing.

I really wanted to like "Room 33". Everything was in place for it to be very entertaining: good production values, decent camerawork, great acting, and a superb location to do it all in. Unfortunately, the story itself is a load of crap, and this below average, supernatural slasher certainly drags its feet telling it.

Hoboken Hollow (2006)

"Kidnapping. Slavery. Torture. Murder... For decades the Broderick family built their brutal dominion with the sweat and blood of their captives. Lured with promises of work and shelter, drifters, hobos and migrants found themselves captive at a modern-day slave ranch instead. Inspired by true, horrific crime stories from Texas and beyond, Hoboken Hollow spins a dark tale of violence, terror and slaughter on the farm."

Here's another one that I've already reviewed. 'Hoboken Hollow" is just a poor man's version of every "Ed Gein" inspired story out there, but full of usually good actors who should've known better.

Curtains (1983)

"The stage is finally set for 'Audra,' Jonathan Stryker's latest movie, to begin filming. As six candidates arrive at Stryker's mansion to audition, a deranged murderer stalks to kill them, one by one. Just who is behind the mask, and just how far will they go to make sure the role is theirs?"

Many people suffering from nostalgia on message boards rave about this film. A couple of the kills are gory, but "Curtains" is more of a throwback to '70s giallo than a typical '80s slasher flick.

"Curtains" takes a long time to get warmed up, and I found myself getting bored intermittently even though I watched it all the way through without needing to fast-forward it. The mystery of the killer's identity has a nice twist to it which I didn't see coming.

The transfer isn't that great so a lot of scenes are too dark to see what's going on properly.

Secrets of the Clown (2007)

"After the brutal murder of his best friend Jim, Bobbie is haunted by visions of his mutilated body, sinister clowns and graphic nightmares of a murder in progress. As Bobbie begins to question his own sanity and the strange clues behind his friend's death, he summons a psychic to contact Jim. And when secrets are revealed, Bobbie learns the hard way that some are never meant to be discovered..."

Despite opening well with the gory deaths of a Muscle Mary and his silicon-enhanced girlfriend, "Secrets of the Clown" lost me when it started to look like a camcorder movie.

The heroine wasn't attractive enough to draw me in, and I'm not scared of clowns anyway, so "Secrets of the Clown" was nothing but a waste of 1 hour and 40 minutes for me. The acting is the most horrible part of this movie.

Having endured rather than enjoyed "Secrets of the Clown", I know that I'll never watch it again either.

If you like slasher movies, this isn't a bad multipack, but I really don't like slashers very much and didn't get much out of it. I'm glad that I got "Bloody Slashers" cheap because I would have felt ripped-off if I'd paid $5 for it.

As ever, the Amazon link is to the left (which I have to tell you because I know everyone is using AdBlock and can't see it anyway). The best price for "Bloody Slashers" is less than a dollar which doesn't doesn't surprise me in the least. My copy will either be tossed into an upcoming yard sale or traded-in at the pawn shop. I've got a feeling that a lot of these packs end up being used as replacement cases for better movies or given to thrift shops though.

Having now watched two of the four movie "Midnight Horror Collection" packs, it's highly likely that I won't like the third one which I own a copy of either. I'll probably go through it next week then take a break before reviewing my final, still unopened "8 Movie Pack".

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