December 17, 2012

Horror Christmas Presents for Paupers - Part 2

Every horror fan loves to get movies for Christmas, but you know how it is. Either they've already seen it or it's now on Blu-ray and costs twenty times that of the DVD version. So what can you do?

It's simple.

Make Your Own Horror Movie

Unfortunately, this would involve spending far too much money on a $20 Jazz cam from Wal-mart and, although it wouldn't take you any longer to make than the duration of the movie itself, it's not for everyone.

If you look at the other "indie horror movies" around, it's obvious that you don't need a script, acting ability, originality or any talent whatsoever to make your own horror movie. You don't even need actors as glove puppets or your cat will do. But unless you really want to film Tiddles washing ketchup off herself and showing some nipples, the prospect of making anything which will perk the average horror fan up is filled with too many problems.


Some people have been stupid enough to make their own horror movies for their ex-loved ones only to discover them being mass-produced and sold at horror conventions for $19.99 six months later. If you are thinking of shaky-camming your boobies and running round the house while dressed up as a zombie and screaming, please don't. My cat still hasn't forgiven me for "The Furry Xmas Invader" which, incidentally, you can buy from me (while stocks last) for only $16,087.99 plus tax and shipping. (Please note that the limited "Unrated - Hairball Edition" is no longer available.)

Instead, how about creating your own version of the Mill Creek boxsets using easily downloadable and legally free Public Domain movies? Yes, my friends, this is the way to not even have to pay $5 for 50 nasties! They may not be original movies, but the selection and the order you put them in will be all your own work.


Make Your Own Public Domain Horror DVDs


You will need:

1. Either a blank DVD-R or DVD+R. (3 for $1 at Dollar Tree!)
2. The internet.
3. DownloadHelper.
4. DeVeDe or DVD Flick. They are both free!
5. A few hours of your time.
6. A crappy DVD movie that you can re-use the case from. (Multi disc cases are best for this so look out for those 2-disc "Special Editions" which weren't so special.)


Step 1

Find a source of Public Domain horror movies online. Hint: Google is your friend.

To save yourself a few minutes, you may like to go to my YouTube channel where some of the better Public Domain horror movies are. Don't forget to subscribe!


Step 2

Install DownloadHelper, restart Firefox, and when you are on the correct page, click the little spinning balls on the toolbar to select what kind of download you desire. In this case, it should be the file name that ends in .mp4.


Step 3

Install either DeVeDe or DVD Flick. They are much the same so whichever one you use is really only dependent on your computer system. If you use Linux, DeVeDe is the only sensible choice.


Step 4

Learn how to use DeVeDe or DVD Flick by reading the instructions, then burn your mp4 movies to blank DVDs.

Please note: This is the tricky part as it may involve reading. It's worth the effort because you can fit at least four movies on a single DVD once you get the hang of the software.


Step 5

Download a DVD coverart template and some nice pictures to decorate the insert for your DVD with. Pro-tip: Mill Creek tend to use pictures of actors from movies that they've never even starred in for their coverart so feel free to use their example.

You don't need to be a fantastic artist for this or buy any expensive graphics software. You could even draw or cut pictures out by hand, glue them to the right sized piece of paper and photocopy it. In fact, that's what most "indie horror movie" distributors do anyway.


Step 6

Throw away the original coverart and the DVD for "The Strangers", "Cloverfield", "Hostel" or whichever crappy movie you are replacing. Put your new coverart and DVD-R into the DVD case then wrap it up for Christmas.


Step 7

Enjoy the excited gasps as your horror fan opens the highly original collection of Public Domain horror movies on Christmas Day!

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