May 2, 2007

À l'intérieur (2007)

(AKA Inside)

Well, I've just finished watching this unadulterated piece of shite again and feel that's another hour and a quarter of my life which I will never get back. If it hadn't been for the first 30 minutes boring me too rigid to even move, I would certainly not have watched the rest of this atrocity at all.

Not only was it YET ANOTHER HOME INVASION film, but it was a poorly done one at that.

If the CGI foetus that kept appearing wasn't enough to put anybody off, the sheer incompetence of the dumbest French flics to ever appear on screen should do... although you have to give them credit for managing to turn up at Vanessa Paradis' sister's house without her even giving them her address on the phone.

Pretty much all credibility and empathy is lost soon after the horrendous "Ghost" moment. Yeah, it just needs Patrick Swayze and a potter's wheel to complete the awfulness of it all.

But it is gory... very, very gory. I wouldn't say that it's the bloodiest film I've ever seen, but "gorehounds" will undoubtedly get a kick out of it, even if it is all over the top and ludicrous.

It's not scary unless you are pregnant and hormonal, doesn't have much tension or suspense, and is really quite inferior to "Ils" which got released in the US last year.

I'm giving it 1 out of 10 because it was nice to see Beatrice "Betty Blue" Dalle in something again. It's just a pity that it didn't live up to the hype that other online reviewers have fallen for. Without Beatrice Dalle, "Inside" wouldn't have got any points at all.

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