March 31, 2012

Jesus wept buckets!



I guarantee that you won't make it through this without feeling like punching somebody and, in particular, the nasty screeching thing who is the star of the video itself.

This is awful. Her discordant voice, her shouting, her screaming, her "singing"... Not to be mean or anything, but sometimes I'm a little bit envious of deaf people.

March 30, 2012

Ilsa: She Wolf of the SS (1975)



"Ilsa is an evil Nazi warden at a death camp that conducts medical experiments. Ilsa's goal is to prove that woman can withstand more pain and suffering than men and therefore should be allowed to fight on the front lines."

Although "women in prison" dramas aren't really my thing, I had nothing better to watch so I went through all four "Ilsa" exploitation movies back to back.

Obviously the first one, "Ilsa: She Wolf of the SS", is the best one and it gained some notoriety during the "video nasty" era in Britain. I'm still not completely sure if an uncut version is legally available in the UK especially as the short run of the Anchor Bay DVD release is now stupidly expensive.

For what it was, which was basically a softcore porn movie with some torture scenes, "Ilsa: She Wolf of the SS" kept my interest all the way through. I wouldn't say that any of the acting was particularly good but Dyanne Thorne, in spite of not being that attractive facially to me, was quite sexy in other ways.

The story itself was a bit of a boy's adventure in spite of the emphasis really being on the girls in the film. It was juvenile and exploitative but some of the effects held up well for a film made 38 years ago. The make-up was very good indeed but the hirsuteness of the women tended to take away a lot of the eroticism from their scenes as did all the screaming in agony which also accompanied most of them.


As we all know, the Nazis did far worse things in their stalags than anything depicted in this film but, if you are a little bit delicate, you might still find the torture and gore scenes shocking. Some people find films like this funny, but they have something mentally wrong with them anyway.

I'm not sure if I actually enjoyed my time with "Ilsa" as much as I was fascinated by what the filmmakers got away with back in the 1970s. The sequels ("Harem Keeper of the Oil Sheiks", "The Wicked Warden" and "The Tigress of Siberia") completely ignored the ending of "Ilsa: She Wolf of the SS" and were just more of the same in different settings except weaker and more toned down.

Since the "Ilsa" movies are really cult exploitation fodder rather than horror per se, I'm dubious about recommending them to horror fans, but with the current dearth of any new horror releases, they are something to pass the time with instead of rewatching the classics over and over again.

March 28, 2012

So I didn't win an iPad again!

It comes as no surprise really that I entered yet another iPad giveaway and didn't win. I'm not even going to name the website which did it as they don't deserve any recognition of their existence.

I also didn't win a free Blu-ray in a giveaway hosted by a horror website. I don't care about that so much because not only was the movie completely crap, it wasn't really horror, and I don't even own a Blu-ray player to watch it on should I have been one of the unlucky ones.

All these things are fixed in favour of stooges anyway especially the "too good to be true" offers which you get spammed with on Twitter every time you mention an Apple product.


Now that I don't have Netflix anymore, I'm not even sure what I would do with an iPad. I'm pretty sure that it's nothing more than a toy computer and wouldn't actually be useful for anything but I still want one just to find out.

The trouble is that I don't want to spend over $500 on something which I predict will end up unused in a drawer within a few days of getting it.

To win one would be awesome because then I could fiddle with it, get bored, and either pass it on to somebody who doesn't have a real computer or trade it in somewhere for all the "After Dark Horrorfest" DVDs and a selection of little cakes.

To me, the Apple iPad is just a big, awkward iPhone. I've heard that it doesn't work with Flash (so that means no YouTube) and its storage capacity is so pitiful that even my humble Asus Eee PC netbook (now with EasyPeasy on it) is a more viable alternative.


But I still want to win one and keep on trying. It'll probably be the iPad's 10th generation before I ever come as close to getting one as I did with that "Fright Night" competition which left a really bad taste in my mouth and caused me to boycott the film in anger (not that I would have ever watched that crappy remake anyway). Yes, I will whinge about that until the day I die just so you know.

If you have an iPad which you don't want, even if it's one of the first ones and only has 16gb of RAM, I'm here ready for it should you want it to go to a good (or any) home. I promise to be bored with it within three days maximum and pass it on to someone else. I am also willing to accept an iPhone, iPod Touch (iTouch?), Kindle or Nook - all of which I have as much use for as a second pair of buttocks.

The Hunger Games (2012)



"Set in a future where the Capitol selects a boy and girl from the twelve districts to fight to the death on live television, Katniss Everdeen volunteers to take her younger sister's place for the latest match."

Nearly every YouTube trailer for "The Hunger Games" says "Embedding disabled by request" so obviously even Lionsgate are ashamed of this crap.


I'd rather re-read "The Long Walk" by Stephen King (alias Richard Bachman) and I hate reading books.

That is all.

Amp Energy has changed the design on their cans!

As a long term Monster energy drinker, there are, unfortunately, times when I've exhausted the supply in my local inconvenience store and had to resort to the "poor man's Monster" known as Amp Energy.

It's not a bad drink but sort of gutless like most Pepsi products and it doesn't give me any energy or real satisfaction other than having a different green can to drink out of.

Since it was 73 degrees outside, I went out and got myself a couple of slices of pizza (2 for $3) and, surprise, surprise, there was no Monster in the fridge so I had to buy an Amp. But it wasn't the normal black can with green writing on it, it was this (pictured left).

At first I wasn't sure if it was a real Amp or one of those pathetic sugar (and taste) free versions which I still don't understand the point of. On closer inspection, I realised that they'd changed the design on the can to something more contemporary. When I saw the price was "2 for $3" (just like the pizza), I thought "What the Hell", and bought a couple anyway. Let's face it, it's never going to be even as good as Gridlock from Aldi but, if you are thirsty and Amp is on offer, it'll do.

So, I had two slices of pizza (pepperoni and buffalo chicken, in case you wondered) and two Amps. I sat outside, the sun was shining (and Summer seems to be on its way), and I almost enjoyed the experience.

"But what has this got to do with horror?" I hear you ask. Absolutely nothing at all except that I needed a break after filling up my external hard drive with over 600 DVD rips of my favourite horror DVDs. It has taken me years to copy them over using an assortment of programs including "1Click DVD copy" and "DVD Cloner" just for the sake of being able to plug my drive into any of my computers and watch horror movies anywhere without having to drag a load of DVDs around with me.

I'm going to be upgrading my operating system on my desktop computer later this year to openSUSE as I'm a little bit bored with Linux Mint now. Linux Mint all works as well as it should (although I preferred Ubuntu 9.10) so I have no good reason for changing but I can't stand the "Unity vs. Gnome 3 vs. Cinnamon vs. MATE" kerfuffle so I'm switching to KDE. Having all my movies on an external hard drive will mean that I will have a lot of working space again even though I'm bound to drag a lot of them back on, but I will cover all this, of course, in another post.

As you can see in the video below, openSUSE 12.1 matches the Amp can almost perfectly.

Woohoo! 300 subscribers!


I wasn't going to say anything but since my nemesis on Blogger always posts something lame every time he gets another 50 followers, I thought I'd mark this milestone in the history of "Dr Blood's Video Vault" on Blogger too.

So, I now have 300 followers (or subscribers as I prefer to think of them). I have also written 630 blog posts and had 168,312 page views according to the Blogger stats. That's not bad considering that I moved everything here from my original website well under 2 years ago and didn't write anything at all for 4 months (at the end of last year to the beginning of this one).

I also have 860 followers on Twitter (which is great considering that I only follow 14 people back) and a few more people dotted around Facebook, MySpace, Networked Blogs and Bloglovin'.

Thank you all for subscribing, reading my poorly written posts, reviews, rants and raves, but, most of all, for commenting occasionally.

March 26, 2012

Wal-mart has 2860 horror DVDs


Well, Wal-mart sort of has 2680 horror DVDs. I got bored and looked up all the horror titles currently available from Wal-mart. If you remove all the duplicates, non-horror movies which are in the wrong section, and really crappy ones, it's still quite an impressive catalogue of well over 2000.

If you were to only watch a couple of horror movies each day, it would take you nearly 6 years to watch every horror movie which Wal-mart has available, although if you only wanted to watch good ones and avoid all that low-budget, handycam dreck, it would take you about 6 months.

A lot of hatred gets slung at the success of Wal-mart due the alleged damage to small (and often overpriced) businesses, but they've never done me any harm. As a small business owner, I wouldn't have been able to afford half the things I needed if it wasn't for the Wal-mart corporation, and as a horror movie lover, I certainly wouldn't have the collection which I have now if I'd had to rely on Best Buy, Blockbuster or FYE with their often ridiculous prices

Of course, I also buy a lot of movies from pawn shops, which 9 times out of 10 were originally purchased by someone from Wal-mart, so that's another reason why I love their stores. It's a very rare thing for me to ever go beyond the prices of Wal-mart's bargain bin or $5.00 range for a DVD because, honestly, DVDs aren't really worth anything anyway, no matter how important they may seem to those of us who collect them.

At the present time, I probably still buy four to eight DVDs a week. I don't have cable television or Netflix anymore, so I prefer to spend my money on physical copies of horror movies. I'm not a big fan of downloading (either legally or illegally), but I have watched a few movies online only to go out and buy the DVD properly. I'd guess that I'm one of the exceptions to the rule though, as there are some people nowadays who have massive collections of nothing but downloaded movies and wouldn't dream of buying a DVD or giving anything back to the industry.

Anyway, I just thought I'd share my discovery. I didn't know that Wal-mart had so many horror movies available. It sucks that they have stopped restocking a lot of good horror movies which they used to have, but there's really nothing much to complain about at all with what they have now.

March 24, 2012

A visit to the Pawn Shop

As most of you already know, I love going to my local pawn shop at least once a week in search of DVDs which I'm too lazy to go all the way up to Wal-mart for.

This time, I just had to buy these 4 packs especially as they were 4 for $10. Yes, that's 16 films for $10. For that price, who cares that the Echo Bridge ones are all crap (and so are are quite a few of the others)?


Obviously I had to get the two Universal 4 horror movie marathon packs even though I already had half the films on them individually. That's another four films I can now sell at a yard sale and save two spaces on my DVD shelves.


I bought the "Dark Comedy" pack just for "Serial Mom" and "Very Bad Things" as I have no intention of watching the others. The Echo Bridge pack was still sealed so I thought that I might as well have it for one day when I absolutely have nothing better to watch on TV or a freshly painted wall to watch dry.

For those of you wondering what I got for my birthday earlier this week, it was a bottle of Christian Brothers Honey Liqueur, a bottle of Red Cat wine, a bottle of Harvey's Bristol Cream sherry, a chocolate cat, 10 cans of Monster, a box of Gyro meat, and 50 DVD+Rs for burning Linux operating systems to as and when they are released.

I also bought myself another Echo Bridge "4 Sci-Fi Films Collector's Set" ("T-Force", "Lifepod", "Star Knight", "Hidden Agenda"), "Apt Pupil", "Strange Behavior" (1981), and "Feast 2: Sloppy Seconds". I'm sure you aren't interested in any of those though or the fact that I had a chicken jalfrezi for my birthday dinner.

March 20, 2012

Happy Birthday, Dr Blood!


Yes, today is my birthday.

A long time ago in a galaxy far, far away... I was born. Who would have thought that I would ever have made it this far or have done the things that I've done? Who would have even cared? Nobody probably.



So, as usual with my birthdays, it's a time of reflection for me on not just the last year of my life but thinking about all the things that I've done and have yet to do. Don't worry, I'm not going to bore you with the details.

To be honest, the whole of last year was completely shit for me. I had problems with my teeth, had lots of other health problems, couldn't move house for six months from the nastiest apartment in the worst neighbourhood ever, ended one business, struggled to get another one up and running, got some grey in my beard and, basically, it was the second worst year of my life.

This year, I'm taking it easier. I don't particularly care about my blogging anymore as I've found other things to do more passively on the internet and which I find more enjoyable.

In real life, I've now got a much easier job, a better place to live in, I'm enjoying my cats and my movie collection, and I'm just chillaxing.

Happy birthday to me!

March 17, 2012

Happy St. Patrick's Day 2012


If you are looking for something to watch tonight, check out your local Wal-mart's bargain bin where you will find the first four "Leprechaun" movies in one pack for only $5.

You can also get the same thing from Amazon for only a couple of dollars more.

March 8, 2012

Playlist of Horror



Since I've been neglecting my blog again this week, I thought I'd better let you all know why. Not only have I got a new early morning job which means that each day is now completely backwards for me, but, also, I've been spending most of my time watching the plethora of full movies on YouTube.

As someone who has never really been into YouTube for uploading videos, I don't know if what I am going to say is going to make me look like a fool or whether something has actually changed on YouTube since the downfall of the Mega channels. I've noticed that there are now a hell of a lot more copyright infringing full movies on YouTube than ever before.

I wonder if this is a conscious effort by YouTube users to annoy the piss out of anyone who supported the SOPA act or if it's just because, with Megavideo and QuickSilverScreen now gone forever, there's nowhere else to easily upload movies anymore. Whatever the case, I'm the last person to complain about free horror movies.

I've found some absolute gems so far which I'm sure you'll enjoy too if you check out my playlist (above or on my YouTube channel itself). There are horrors from the '70s and '80s which I don't think even have a DVD release plus TV movies which I never thought I'd see again.

How long this blatant disregard for other people's copyrights is going to last before somebody steps in and shuts it all down is anyone's guess so I advise you to watch as much as you can while you can, and, of course, if you like what you see, buy it on DVD if at all possible.

If you don't care about any of this, here's an amusing picture which someone posted on Facebook recently. It makes you think, doesn't it?

March 4, 2012

Flesh and Blood: The Hammer Heritage of Horror (1994)



Everything you ever wanted to know about the old Hammer horror movies.

Although this excellent documentary has been on different movie sites for ages, this is the first time that I've seen it in full on Youtube. I've posted it above to save you the trouble of looking for it yourself.

This is a great way to remember Hammer as it used to be. The new incarnation with its unnecessary remakes has tainted the Hammer name. No wonder they are now looking for lost footage from the '50s and '60s although I'm surprised that they don't just remake that too.

March 3, 2012

It's Caturday! Inside (2007)


I'm starting this new feature for Saturdays since this is the quietest time of the week on the internet and. of course, I can't resist the pun.

Here's a still from the infamous cat scene in the overrated French gore movie "À l'intérieur" (known to English speakers as "Inside").

Béatrice Dalle looked really good cuddling a black cat, don't you think? It's a pity that it all ended so badly. Le pauvre chat.

At least the poor little bugger got more attention from "La Femme" than he did from Alysson Paradis' character.

Kicked back inside the house. Oh, the indignity!
Completely ignored by the sleeping human.
Brushed from the bed. Just shameful.

For more horror cats, please check out http://horrorcats.blogspot.com.

The Horror Cats

March 2, 2012

How many "Extreme Horror" movies have you seen?



I found this video on YouTube earlier and, although I've seen about 80% of the movies listed, there's no way that I've seen them all. There are some movies on there which simply don't interest me, not because they are gory (because I love that) but due to being poorly filmed, amateur, handycam dreck which I don't have the patience for.

I'm also not overly keen on Japanese extreme horror movies either because they are just a bit too silly for my own taste but I'm sure somebody likes them or they wouldn't exist in the first place.

Until "A Serbian Film" came along, the nastiest thing I'd seen was "Martyrs" and I still think it's the best of all of them.


Anyway, how many of these extreme horror movies have you seen? Which ones are your favourites? Let me know in the comments below.

My FaceySpace needs your love!


In case you didn't realise, I replaced my little Facebook group with a real page some time ago but I haven't really been promoting it.

If you want to keep up to date with my new posts on here, it's a useful alternative to the Google Friend Connect widget or Twitter especially if you spend a lot of time on Facebook.

The URL is www.facebook.com/DrBloodsVideoVault2
(www.facebook.com/DrBloodsVideoVault - without the "2" on the end - is for people who I already know, in case you wondered).

See you there!

March 1, 2012

Hudson Horror Show V



DAY OF THE DEAD, PHANTASM, FRIDAY THE 13TH (UNCUT) and THE LEGEND OF THE 7 GOLDEN VAMPIRES and a SECRET 5TH FEATURE all screened from 35mm film.

Hudson Horror Show

On Saturday, May 19th, 2012, the hallowed grounds of the Silver Cinemas South Hills 8 will once again showcase the greatest classic horror film festival in the Hudson Valley, Hudson Horror Show V (www.hudsonhorror.com)! Our fifth 12 hour movie festival will feature five full length classic genre films along with shorts and drive in style trailers, all off rare 35mm film prints!

Our December to Dismember 2011 show was a sell out with people having to be seated in our “reserved for staff seats”. Don’t miss out, grab your tickets now! This is our third year of shows and ticket prices are still only $26.00 in advance via PayPal. Advance ticket holders save money and will be admitted first. If any tickets remain they will be available at the door on the day of the show for $30.00, cash only.

Our Frankenstein like monster of a lineup is now complete! Doors open at noon that day and our “opening act” will be a mash up of two of the greatest movie studios of all time as Hammer Films and the Shaw Brothers collide in LEGEND OF THE SEVEN GOLDEN VAMPIRES! This film, also know as The Seven Brothers Meets Dracula, mixes Gothic horror with well, kung fu, it’s kind of like putting your peanut butter in my chocolate, who knew they would taste so good together?

We’ll have our semi-traditional “Mystery Movie” in the lineup and that could be just about anything at this point. Perhaps some blaxploitation? How about a good old fashioned rape/revenge flick? Maybe some more giant monsters? Our lips are sealed until show time but we are sure the mystery movie will be anything but a disappointment.

Hudson Horror Five will then push on full steam ahead with our triple axe attack triple headliner! Our zombie movie for this show will be an extremely rare screening of George A. Romero’s DAY OF THE DEAD. Unfortunately this amazing film was barely seen in theaters upon its original theatrical run in 1985, and it’s had even fewer screenings since. We are proud to unearth this zombie classic one more time.

Headliner number two will be a movie that has been constantly requested by Hudson Horror fans, PHANTASM! Dwarf zombies, crazy bugs, killer spheres and of course, “The Tall Man”, the nightmarish masterpiece will definitely make you want to sleep with the lights on.

Our third and final headliner of this triple threat will be none other than the incredibly influential slasher flick, the original, FRIDAY THE 13th! This film, originally released in 1980, was a watershed horror release and kick started the slasher craze that took Hollywood by storm for many years to come. Perhaps the biggest star of the film isn’t Jason Voorhees, but Tom Savini’s realistic and gruesome special effects. These effects were unfortunately toned down in 1980 so the producers could secure an “R” rating. However, we’ve been lucky enough to obtain a print that has the best parts intact! At long last, Hudson Horror presents the UNCUT version of the original FRIDAY THE 13th off 35mm film!

We will have the usual shorts, drive in trailers, vendors, giveaways, trivia questions and usual nonsense that make Hudson Horror so much fun. We’ll have just a few vendor spots for HHV, if you are interested in selling or promoting your wares, or if you just have questions regarding our show, send us an email to info@hudsonhorror.com. Get your tickets early for Hudson Horror Show V, and we’ll see you on May 19th, 2012!

[Reposted from my email]