October 2, 2011

American Psycho 2 (2002)

"A girl named Rachael has developed a taste for murder and will stand at nothing to become a college professor's assistant."

I saw that this was on Netflix so I thought I'd better see what all the fuss about Mila Kinis was about. Since I'm not overly impressed by actresses with whining voices and heads which appear to be too large for their bodies, I didn't think I'd get much out of the experience.

I'd only seen Mila Kunis in "The Book of Eli" and "Black Swan" (both from 2010) and she seemed to be okay but nothing exceptional. Going back to a film she made eight years before, however, showed her to be absolutely dreadful.

"American Psycho II: All American Girl", to give it its longer title, had very little in common with the original "American Psycho" (2000) so don't be fooled by the trailer. Christian Bale was nowhere to be found in this and the whole production reeked of lame teen comedy.

The story was so simple as to be actually rather dull. Mila's character wanted to be an FBI profiler and decided to kill off any classmates (or other impediments) who might stand in the way of securing a teaching assistant's job which would fasttrack her into the Bureau.

It all went a little bit too smoothly apart from some ineffectual interference from Geraint Wyn Davies as a psychiatrist. Maybe if he'd still been Nick Knight some vampire action might have spiced things up a bit.

There were a couple of good kills but nothing too much on camera which was a shame. Although Mila Kunis seemed to be trying to act in her part as serial-killer Rachael, she wasn't very convincing especially without a ton of gore which could have backed her up. Everything was just too sanitised and bland.

One surprise was seeing William Shatner in something other than "Star Trek", "TJ Hooker" or any of those stupid commercials that he does now. Let's be honest here, William Shatner was never the greatest actor in the world but he was a very attractive man when he was younger. To cast him as a philandering college professor was not exactly a stroke of genius however as it just didn't feel right considering his age and weight.

One moment did have me on the edge of my seat but not for a good reason. At one point, the killer (who we don't know at this stage) puts a cat in a microwave oven to distract his owner. It was completely unnecessary to show something like that even though the cat was rescued instantly. There are some stupidly impressionable people out there and I know for a fact that some retarded teenage kids did that very thing quite recently in Canada with a far more tragic result. I don't care what happens to humans in horror movies but stuff like this should not be shown ever.

Because of that scene and the fact that Mila Kunis' voice was worse than somebody scratching their nails down a blackboard to me, I'm throwing this crappy film straight into The Dungeon where it belongs.

If you're a fan of the original "American Psycho", I highly recommend that give this a miss.

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