September 5, 2011

Five Horrors for Labor Day

If this year's "Labor Day" is typical, it's going to rain all day and you'll be stuck inside. So what better way to spend the holiday than by watching women "in labour" (yes, that's how I spell it) giving birth?

This is my top five list of women in horror movies spewing another piece of yowling pestilence into the world.

Rosemary's Baby1. Rosemary's Baby (1968)

"A young couple move into a new apartment, only to be surrounded by peculiar neighbours and occurrences. When the wife becomes mysteriously pregnant, paranoia over the safety of her unborn child begins controlling her life."

Not just any old baby in this classic horror but the spawn of Satan himself! Really you can't get much better than this if you want an evil child to ruin your life.

The Omen (Two-Disc Collector's Edition)2. The Omen (1976)

"An American ambassador learns to his horror that his son is actually the literal Antichrist."

Ok, so he's technically born of a jackal and adopted but the antichrist is an evil little bugger who replaces Katherine Thorn's stillborn offspring.

The Fly (Two-Disc Collector's Edition)3. The Fly (1986)

"A brilliant but eccentric scientist begins to transform into a giant man/fly hybrid after one of his experiments goes horribly wrong."

The fly-baby seems like just Veronica's nightmare near the end of this remake but we know it's going to happen in "The Fly II". Even worse, it's going to grow up to be red-headed Eric Stoltz!

A Serbian Film4. A Serbian Film (2010)

"An aging porn star agrees to participate in an art film in order to make a clean break from the business, only to discover that he has been drafted into making a paedophilia and necrophilia themed snuff film."

Let's all say it together, "Newbooooorrrrn Pooooorrrn!" If fake rubber babies freak you out, this is the film for you!

Grace5. Grace (2009)

"After losing her unborn child, Madeline Matheson insists on carrying the baby to term. Following the delivery, the child miraculously returns to life with an appetite for human blood. Madeline is faced with a mother's ultimate decision."

A vampire baby almost makes up for the rest of this low-budget film actually being pretty awful. Anyone want Bitty instead of their waterlogged barbecue now?

Of course, there are plenty of other horror films involving pregnancy and babies such as "Dawn of the Dead" (2004) or the immensely overrated "À l'intérieur" (2007) but, don't kid yourself, you aren't going to have time to watch any more today nor, after this selection, will you even want to.

Happy Labor Labour Day!

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