July 17, 2002

Nude for Satan (1974)

(AKA Nuda per Satana)

"While driving through the countryside late at night, Dr. Benson finds a crashed car with a young woman hanging out of it. The doctor puts the girl in his car and drives for help to the nearest house, which turns out to be a mysterious castle. He is greeted at the door by a woman who looks exactly like the woman from the car, and she invites them both to stay for the night. The doctor soon discovers that his host is not the only one in the castle, and that this beautiful woman is concealing a terrifying secret."

I don't get it! I looked round the internet for reviews of this before watching it and they were all saying how this is a masterpiece of Italian sexploitation and how beautiful the girl is in it and all sorts of other misleading rubbish like that.

This movie was made in 1974 and looks like a cross between anything from the Emanuelle series and a really ugly Jean Rollin gothic nasty. I could barely watch this because the lead male character was so homely.

The girl is attractive, I suppose, but once she gets naked it is pretty obvious that this was made well before Brazilian waxing. I don't think I've ever seen a hairier one! It almost reaches her belly button!!!

Oh there's a plot here too, "a man who stops at a remote castle hoping to get medical help for an injured woman, only to find the inhabitants mirror the darker sides of the woman and himself" (from the IMDb). Yeah, who cares? I could barely follow it anyway.

I was just waiting for the lesbian sex scenes to kick in and they were dire. It was like a poor man's version of "The Hunger", all soft focus and you don't see anything.

So, the bottom line is that I hated it. It was so slow moving that I was convinced that I had been watching it for about 4 hours. The dubbing was awful, the story was a mess, and it was just bloody awful.

Don't believe any other review on the internet about this film but mine. The DVD of this used to sell at an extortionate price and it's not worth tuppence!

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